Twice I tried to write a last blog post. A kind of conclusion of sorts. I'm not certain that anyone will ever know I wrote this last post, but I have to do it because I don't like leaving loose ends. Plus, I plan to print off this blog and if it doesn't have a conclusion, I'll go crazy.
When I say "I tried writing", I mean that I wrote them, but never posted them. Probably never will. Both were written when I was rather emotional and wasn't really thinking clearly about what I was writing.
The first one was a chronological order of events about my last week in Korea. A lot of it was hilarious - I'm pretty sure everything wrong that could've happened to me, happened. But a lot of it was also me being emotional about leaving.
The second post was once I was home for a couple weeks. I missed Korea and it felt like the entire year had been a dream. I didn't like that feeling that an entire year seemed like it never happened. It didn't make things any better that, while people were genuinely interested in what I did over the year, they didn't get as excited about it that I was in telling it. Simply because they weren't there. They don't know about Korea like I do. I don't blame them. I didn't know anything about it before I went either. At the time though, I just wanted to tell them that everyone should know this stuff so they should suck it up and listen to what I have to say. But I didn't. And I'm glad I didn't.
After being home for almost four months, I can honestly say, that I am no longer the emotional girl I was when I first came home. I talk to my Korean friends regularly and keep up to date with things going on there. I look fondly back on my time there.
That being said, I'm thinking about going back in April. But that's just it - Thinking. I have plans of what I want to do here. I just can't decide if I should put those on hold for another year, or start them now. The travel bug is still with me and always will be. But I'm waiting on my Father to show me my next steps. No matter where I go, I'll get emotional about leaving home and then leaving where ever I end up. That's who I am. That doesn't make things easier, but it helps me to understand myself and how I'll react to situations and allows me to better prepare myself for what's to come. I'm excited about 2011 and what it'll bring for me and won't worry a bit about it because I have a feeling that next year will be amazing - no matter what country, province, or city I am in. Because, like I mentioned, I know myself. I'll make it a good year whether I spend the year traveling or working at a store in Haldimand County. That's just who I am.
